I jsut had an argument with somebody who always insisted on talking to me, and moreover had to refer to me as "cutie" and other names like that. I don't mind being called that way once in a time or on appropriate occasions, but when it's incessant, i find it annoying.

What happened is, i told the person about the situation and it obviously got him irritated, as it is very visible, and so our vapid chatter degenerated into an argument, where my opposite always showed a good dose of immaturity, and of absoltuely wanting to be right and jsutified: it's not a way of getting through a matter, solving a problem, if all that you want is defending yourself. I must admit i fully grasped thatcocnept just now, and i must say i'm grateful to that random person for that, and will try from now on to put aside feeling of attacks and always argue with the question of the argument in mind. Still, I'd like to ask you wich side you are taking and why: here you go.

Me (21:36:23): thanks

Him (21:36:31): yeah

Me (21:37:03): So i am really good. I went to a manifestation against war in Iraq today and yesterday i was at a party where i drank a whole lot more than i ever drank

Him (21:37:21): cool

Me (21:38:50): oh, yeah

Me (21:38:58): saw lots of cute boys

Me (21:39:04): discussed the depth of my vagina

Him (21:39:24): yeah, sorry but parties don't interest me. so if you could end your talk about parties that'd be great :)

Me (21:40:33): alright

Me (21:40:34): there

Me (21:40:36): it's all finished

Him (21:40:41): yay

Him (21:41:20): that and it's a little bit hypocritical that you can call others "cute" and such yet get offended when others call you it ;-)

Me (21:41:45): well i don't think it's in the same context at all

Me (21:41:52): i don't give you tons of "honey, sweetie cutie"

Me (21:41:57): i merely describe those guys

Me (21:42:05): i don't go and call them as if they were my pets

Me (21:42:16): i think there's a major nuance there, that you didn't grasp

Him (21:42:41): I don't call you one as if you were my pet and if you don't grasp that than maybe you should open your eyes a little bit ;-)

Me (21:43:16): the concept makes it as if I was your pet: you're only twisting the question around for your convenience

Me (21:43:56): i mean it seems obvious to me that describing somebody as being physically attractive and incessantly calling soembody you barely know by love-names is different

Me (21:44:08): even if the word "cute" applies in both situation....

Him (21:44:14): I didn't ask a question and I don't treat people like animals so you're suggesting that you know what meaning I had behind my words when you don't know me

Me (21:44:52): i didn't mean animals. I meant pet. By wich i indicated a degree of intimacy that is innapropriate

Him (21:45:00): well when I said "cutie" I was talking about physical appearance but anyways

Him (21:45:32): so therefore if you have something against me saying you're cute yet you can talk about how cute boys are, than that would make you a hypocrite

Me (21:45:34): yeah, right. i suppose "sweetie" and "honey" and the likes are the same. And still, you don't go around calling acquaintances like this!

Him (21:45:51): when have I used honey? lets see, never

Him (21:46:21): considering I don't use the words honey or sweetie when talking to anyone

Me (21:46:23): either you don't understand or either you're just trying to unskillfully turn it to your dvantage

Me (21:46:38): but cutie is the same!!!!

you're not even trying to understand what i'm saying

Me (21:46:41): you're just defending yourself

Me (21:46:49): and trying to find ways to call me an hypocrite ebcause you're pissed

Me (21:46:52): mature reaction!

Him (21:47:02): and what are you doing? telling me "the facts"?

Me (21:47:08): yes.

Me (21:47:39): i'm telling you i don't like to be called things like that. I don't mind being described: it's less demeaning

Me (21:47:50): And i don't like incessant reference to it neither

Him (21:48:01): whatever. and you wanna talk about mature? who's the one who draws images of herself axing up her ex b/f

Him (21:48:07): theres mature for ya

Me (21:48:30): but if you're unable to grasp that subtletie and jsut want to stubbornly act as if you were in a justified position, then i don't have anything more to say to you

Him (21:48:32): or the one talking about how they drank more than they ever have before like it's an accomplishment

Me (21:48:46): well hm, thats just conscious relief of frustration. I'm aware and don't really want to axe him up

Me (21:48:56): i didn't mean it like an accomplishment...

Me (21:49:01): i just stated what happened

Him (21:49:17): yeah

Me (21:49:18): but see? you're twisting the question around again

Me (21:49:48): because i tell you your eaction is immature, you immediately have to prove me how immature i am myself... ah!

Him (21:50:28): no I'm not, you're saying I am everytime I say something to make yourself look better and try to make what you're saying "the facts" so you know what? this conversation is over because I don't feel like arguing with the type of person like you who accuses people they don't even know of things

Me (21:52:08): This way of perceiving things is pretty amusing. How to say. You don't know how to reply, so you're trying to make me into a pretentious person, when pretention has nothing to do with it. Moreover, you protray me as an accuser, to justify yourself again. And still, the question stays unanswered!

Me (21:53:57): Don't call me names. That's all. Qualify people as being cute, but don't make reference to me as a "cutie". It's simply lessening. What's so difficult in understanding in that. Listen, you're only reacting here out of irritation... As OK GO would say, "get over it"

Him (21:55:10): what the fuck question are you talking about already? I was saying "cutie" in the form of physically cute. okay?!? if you want to believe I was saying it the other way so you feel better about yourself, go the fuck ahead. Now, you are off my buddy list, I don't care to talk to you anymore, so how about you drop the shit and stop trying to act like you know everything. I can't stand people and thought you were one of the less aggrevating people I knew but I was wrong on that.

Him (21:55:40): and if I were to of said "How are ya cute?" it would of made no sense, thefore the word had to be "cutie" to say that you were cute

Me (21:55:41): Ah well, you just don't understand, i see. Too bad you're unable to grasp it

Him (21:55:42): bye

I may have being more diplomatical if i really cared for the eprson.. But it was nott he case, and i never refuse to practice my argumentation skill.

Still? I'd really appreciate your comments: was he right? i am a pretentious and hypocritical bitch? Was it wrong for me not wanting to be called directly and without context a cutie, but still describing other guys i have seen as being cute? Honnestly?

I'll appreciate

-L